Nia as I lie in bed writing this letter with you by my side – September 27th – the emotions are raw – and all I can think about is Mommy and Daddy had prepped for your memorial service in advance – but God! Hearing you breathe next to me is music to my ears.
Even when you are fussy, irritable, and ever so stubborn my heart is always full! Although I can’t always figure out exactly why you are upset at times- the thought of your fussiness just brings amazing tears to my eyes!
Why? Because as I reflect on how far you’ve come and how you are thriving, the only word that sums your journey up is Wonder! You continue defying the odds – and shattering “the death sentence” put on your life before you were born!!
Every year as September 27, 2017 comes around, I replay your birth story in my mind everso vividly – and I remember the loud cry that filled the operating room on this day at 926am – like a sweet melody – the cry wasn’t expected and at that moment i was too shock to fully cry – but the entire room of professionals cried with and for us as they too understood the magnitude of what had just happened – A real miracle!! Your cry demanded bold attention then and your energy continues to radiate and command presence in other people’s heart everyday!
Although you were born 2 weeks early – it was God’s perfect timing! Your gift of life has transformed me in ways I never imagined! I am living a Wonder-FULL life, Unapologetically! Your journey has created a platform fo me to advocate for other moms and babies, women’s health, clean beauty and so much more!!
Because of you, my voice is elevated in a way I couldn’t have even imagined in my wildest dreams! Your life gave me the confidence to bet on myself to take a career JUMP in the midst of COVID – and go big in BIG Tech AND start my own CLEAN Beauty business and lead the charge in demanding safer health and beauty products – Wow!!!
Nia the world is so much better because of your life – and I pray that your tenancious spirit continues to allow you to move confidently in this world – and know your size does not determine your destiny!
Honestly I think you know this already even at the age of 3 and this is more for mommy – as I worry about the day you will come home crying to me that someone teased you for your size or tries to make you feel less than because of your height – your sureness reminds me “I Am Perfect!”
I have gotten better at this worry and think a lot less about it and truly just watch you take on the world with determination and drive! You are sooo darn sure of yourself and have faith that you can literally do anything!!! Your will to do hard things are God’s sweet way of showing me – mama I got this!! “I am fearfully and wonderfully made…” You are my real life beautiful doll baby!
This attitude will allow you to overcome anything and I will be right here to cheer you on!!
God knew the joy you would give to mommy – and although I had to dance in the rain and the real pain of prepping for your death three years ago – I am so thankful that God saw fit for me to experience His Wondrous Works in a way I hadn’t yet seen until that day! Literally the sun was shining on me – okay the operating room lights were but let’s pretend 😂🤪 Your life gave me new life and although this journey hasn’t been easy it has been worth it!
To watch you shed tons of medical equipment has been incredible.
You are the bravest earthly angel I know – surviving life in the NICU 118 days, coding twice in one day during those times my God, open heart surgery, numerous hospitals and doctors visits, medical road trips, the poking and prodding. Yet you are soooo darn resilient and force the entire household to serve as your guinea pigs – I mean patients!
I love how your imagination transforms so quickly from a physician, to a chef, to a superstar – aka lil Beyoncé!
I am so thankful that You Shook My World and Honestly Turned it upside down! I am sooo much better for it as a woman, wife, mom, sister, and friend!
Keep serving me some of life’s greatest lessons and being limitless!!! You are are truly my SHEro and Earthly Angel!!
Mommy and Dad Love You Forever and Ever!
ELS (and daddy too – AAS)